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Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Sweet, Sweet Sam

This isn't an easy post to write. But I figure that if you care enough about my family to still be reading my blog, you care enough to pray with us as well. We have had concerns for Sam's development for a while now. I've had a feeling that all was not "right" with her since I was pregnant. It has been quite the roller coaster and I think it's possible that we just got on the ride. Sam had an appointment yesterday with the neuro-development team at Mary Bridge. She is at about the level of a two to three month old. She turns six months old in a couple of days. We knew that she wasn't laughing yet, and that she didn't initiate smiles, and that you have to force her to make eye contact. We thought it was all social stuff. It's not. She also has really poor muscle tone in her arms and shoulders. And doesn't sit up like she should, and doesn't roll over like she should. I'm not sure why the physical bad news makes this so much bigger to me. Maybe it hits too close to home. My brothers, Daniel, Stephen, and Michail died from spinal muscular atrophy and Tom's brother, Wes is in the end stages of muscular dystrophy. I don't think she has either of those things, but it's, all of a sudden, scary. Sam has had wonderful blessings and they give us so much hope and peace. I guess what we are feeling is turmoil. I am also overcome with gratitude for my own problems. As I was sitting in the waiting room surrounded by really sick kids and these amazing mothers (Shout out to Tiffany. I don't know how you do it...) I was so thankful to be there with my sweet, sweet daughter. She is so wonderful and just draws people in. I don't think most people would guess that there is a problem. She seems so normal. But nothing makes her excited, and, on the other hand, nothing makes her mad. The neuro-development people were excited to see her, because most of the "too good" babies aren't diagnosed until they go to school. It's hard to explain to mom's of fussy babies that you are concerned because your baby is just too good. From here, we still don't know much, but it feels like we are headed in the right direction. It feels good. She has an appointment with a pediatric neurologist and will start occupational therapy once a week. She also qualifies for a bunch of programs run by the county and will have a nurse coming in to the house to work with her here. Her sisters are good for her, they told us it's great that she's not an only child. Apparently being born into chaos does have it's advantages... As I'm typing this, Sam-o is laying on the floor, watching the twins do puzzles. She just smiled at me, and I feel peace. This sweet child has been sent to us for a reason. We'll do whatever it takes to help her succeed. We love our Sam.

21 comments:

Gillian said...

Sam has such a sweet spirit. I could feel it when I first met her. That baby is here for a reason. I will pray for you and for her. Hang in there and keep us posted on her progress.

steph said...

april, you have the most amazing attitude. you have such a strong, amazing family that you will be blessed through this trial. we will be praying for sam and your family!

The Gunder's from Down Under said...

You are amazing and so strong and i know you will get through this struggle fabulously as you always do. You are all in my prayers. xo

Heather Macbeth said...

I'm happy that doctors are noticing things and will be able to help. Ben and I are always mindful of y'all and we'll continue to pray for little Sam.

Anonymous said...

As I read through your post the thought came to my mind that sweet little Sam couldn't have been sent to a better family. She is so blessed to have you guys and you are so blessed to have her. If you need anything, we are always here :) In the meantime- our prayers are definetely with you!

April Bishop said...

Thanks everybody, for your support and love. I don't always feel like I am strong. Hopefully my Father in Heaven will make up the difference. Your prayers and love make all the difference.

Karen said...

We're here if you need us and until then you know you are in our thoughts and prayers! Will they send you to Children's?

David & Brenda said...

April, I love the photo you sent with your news. Your words were perfect. I love you all so much!! Dad says to tell you he loves you as well.

Melissa said...

April, I came across your blog (don't remember how though). I hope you don't mind me looking at it every once in awhile. My blog is private but if you send me your email address at talk2mel(at)juno(dot)com I'll invite you.
As I was reading this post it brought tears to my eyes. The picture of your little girl is so amazing. I will pray for you, your family, and her. Please keep me in informed. I'll keep you in my prayers as well. Hope of all things are going well for you and your family. Take care and good luck!

WASHINGTON PUCKETTS: said...

I am sorry to hear, but glad things are getting noticed now. I am sure that is part of the reason you had the feeling from the beginning-to prepare you and help you get good care for her from the start. You are strong and a wonderful mother. Sam is so sweet, and even Glory said she is the cutest baby. Even cuter than Simeon and that's saying a lot! We will pray for you guys and know that we love you and are here if you need us.

Rob and Juliann said...

Oh April, keep us posted on how she's doing.

Unknown said...

Hi, April - I received notice of your blog post about Sam thru Google alerts for SMA (we are an SMA angel family). I would love for you to contact me about some SMA matters whenever you might have a few 'free' moments.

Sam is a doll. Actually, all of the girls are!

Lots of prayers headed your way -
Helen Baldwin
jeffreyb@skybest.com
http://thejeffreyjourney.com

Linda Westover said...

I will keep your names on the temple prayer roll! Sam is truly blessed to be in your family, as YOU will be blessed by being her parents. Know that you are all loved. Please keep us posted on how things go.

Teshua said...

April, Im glad I found your blog... Our thoughts and Prayers are with Sam and your family! Keep us posted.

Brenda Sue said...

I love you April and know that things will work themselves out the way they should be in the end.. Read D&C 24:8 it has brought me a lot of strength when I have felt like I had none left to go on.

Jax said...

April,
So I have been reading for a while now but one of my new year resolution was to let people whose blogs I follow know that I am following them. This seemed like an appropriate time. I know there are a lot of people praying for you but more can't hurt. I'll keep in touch and try to be better about letting you know that ther are more people out there who care.
Jax

author said...

I'll add mine to the pile. Best of luck to you and thanks for stopping by my blog.

Tom and Michelle said...

April your kids have a sweet spirit about them. You are in our thoughts and prayers, please keep updated

Krista and Byron said...

Tom and April,
I couldn't help but tear up when I read your post. Of course we will pray for you all. It sounds like you are doing all the best for her.

Liz Wilcken said...

Hello. I admit I stalk your blog occasionally, but just so you don't freak out, I'm Heather Macbeth's older sister. You've got some hilarious kids. I totally relate to this post. My Benjamin was the same. Heather may not remember that since I was here in UT and she was still in high school. Ben is one of those super good kids that loves everyone and everyone loves him. You got lucky. My pediatrician didn't want to start occupational and physical therapy until after he turned one. Ben didn't have ANY motor skills whatsoever. He could sit and that was about it. Couldn't even roll over onto one side. We were blessed with such great therapists. He learned so quickly though. I was amazed. It really humbles you as a parent. We also had the nurses from the county coming to our homes and he had fun playing and learning with them. I know the Lord will bless you and your family. I'll pray for you too because I know how it is. Ben's now almost 4 and you can't even tell that there was something wrong with him. He's still a little behind the other kids, but no one would ever guess.

Jessica Waters said...

April- You are a courageous soul. I know you will et through this, and with grace. You're little Sam is on the Denver pray roll now and my family and my parents are including her in our family fasts this week. Keep us updated. I love ya.