Paramedic for a mom...
Few people have ever heard of the "nasal hemorrhage sling" . Fewer still have used this rare, specialized technique. It is shown here with the added benefit known as the "Barbie Bandaid Factor". The Barbie Bandaid Factor has been shown to decrease crying and increase the efficacy of the "Will Ice Cream Fix It?" bribe. 2 years of paramedic school - $6,000
Litman cardiology stethoscope - $200
Sphygmomanometer - $50
Barbie Bandaid Factor - $2.99
Will Ice Cream Fix It? bribe - $1.76
Stopping the tears in two minutes or less - Priceless!
Useless trivia fact: A sphygmomanometer is just a fancy word for a blood pressure cuff. Who knew that applying a stupidly placed bandaid, listening to a heartbeat and checking a blood pressure could cure the ills that befall those coordinated children that run straight into walls. Without slowing down.
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2 comments:
Yes, sometimes a bandaid is needed even if there's no blood. Or scratches for that matter. Moms magic kisses just don't always cut it. Back when I use to buy "cute" bandaids, we burned through them like nobodies business...they were definitely a cure all. Not so much with the plain ones.
I laughed so hard!! And, yes. I am a good, good grandmother (where do you think my daughter gets the 'good, good mother' from, after all?). Is it a crime to laugh at such a time?!
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